Community

Community: To Come Together with Other People.

I LOVE people and have always been a social butterfly. If I am honest, I would say it is part of my personality, gifts, and character. I want to make sure people feel seen, loved, and cared for. I also desire people to know that they are thought of, considered, and heard.

Recently, my dad looked at me and said… “Ali, one of the beautiful things about how God has created you that is that you are VERY relational. You invest your whole-self into relationships. The lens you process through is in relationships.” I receive my father’s blessing but also realized something about myself in that comment. I knew I loved people, but I never realized to what extent. The BEST thing about being a relational person is that there are always people you can spend time with. The hardest thing about being a relational person is that there are always people I can spend time with. But as many of us have heard before… too much of a good thing can be a bad thing. Ultimately, being a relational person is not bad. But sacrificing self, or family, or community and only having surface level relationships can be detrimental to a person… to me.

in my experience, the older i have gotten, the harder it has become to establish or find community. this can be disappointing as I watch my girls enter different situations and walk out with community… I…like others am busy. I… like others have filled my schedule with things that are mostly good (Although I can easily binge watch a good show… currently I like to watch vet shows although I cover my eyes for at least a quarter of it because I think it Is Gross). I have a family I get to love and be part of; and I am honored to participate in different organizations. I have a choice in each relationship of whether I will be me or if I will be a version of me. being fully me… means I need to allow myself to be vulnerable, but vulnerability means I could be rejected. It is easier for me to be a version of myself than my full self. being a version of me allows me to become who others want me to be. I believe true community is different than what I just described because in community we are choosing into togetherness. Togetherness is an invitation to love in a way that is mutual, honoring, and consistent with others. It is allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and giving ourselves and others permission to explore the deep areas of our soul and to stand in the deep with one another.

So as much as I love people… I have come to recognize I am not great at community. I am not great at long term relationships (it still amazes me that Mike and I have been together, dating and marriage, for about 16 years). It Is something I hope I grow in. It is something I want to be better at. I want to be a person that encourages and welcomes community. Community that allows for growth, change, and new. A community that loves fully and celebrates well. Together.… maybe A.R.C. should be A.R.T. because together is the key WORD of community.

May we continue to learn about true community. May we be people that encourage gathering together so that true community can form.

*The Photo: Charcuterie Party. Invite people over and have everyone bring something to share at a charcuterie party.